I'll Open With A Quote.

"I'm not apathetic. I am a perfectionist who lacks the tools to create perfection"
J.T. Willwright

This pretty much sums up how I'm feeling today. I am definitely starting to get behind in my classes. I believe myself to be a victim of my environment. I believe that the reason I procrastinate so much is because my society forces me to try to attain perfection in everything I do without teaching me how to obtain perfection in my work. It's a cruel, backwards system that drains the life and creativity of the user. Why do I believe this? Because this way I don't have to blame myself for not doing my own work. Isn't it beautiful?

I'm joking of course. I don't believe that. My procrastination is clearly my own fault. I am however starting to fall into a spiral pattern that reoccurs every school semester. I start the semester off well, by the middle of the semester I have gotten my self into an academic pickle, then I work my butt of to get mediocre grades. The whole process makes me feel bad about myself and it just isn't good. The thing that really drives me crazy is that I know this about myself and I always make the pledge to break out of this maddening cycle, but always find myself in it anyway. It really is ridiculous. Somebody help me, please!!

Another bit of news is this. My fiance's birthday is this Sunday. She is turning 20. It will be a fun occasion enjoyed by all who are present. If I had to say one thing about my fiance to sum up all that encompasses her it would have to be.........beautiful. Now some of you might be saying to yourselves, "Beautiful, big deal lots of girls are good looking! That's nothing special." Let me explain. My fiance is beautiful because her eyes tell me a love story everytime I look into them. She's beautiful because her laugh makes me smile even when I don't feel like smiling. She's beautiful because her thoughtfulness and caring attitude towards others makes me want to be a better person. She's beautiful because when I hold her I feel like I have something wonderful, precious, and a cause really worth preserving. She's beautiful for a million other reasons that I don't have the space or time to write on here. That's why the word I would choose for her is beautiful. It doesn't seem so commonplace and normal now, does it?

Well kiddies I'm off to start my weekend and see what challenges it will bring, but before I go I will impart to you a bit of family knowledge that has my whole psychology class perplexed. "You can shingle a dog house with pancakes, but ice cream doesn't have bones" Jackson family wisdom. Think about it. See ya.